I loved reading this! Really moving and a lot I can identify with.
I, too, have felt really seen by WHITE OLEANDER. My mother died when I was 14 and a big part of my mother loss experience has been how my life was one way before her death and after her death it was totally different. Everything from my old life, material and emotional, was gone overnight. I literally never saw it again. WHITE OLEANDER was the first book that articulated that loss on the page in a way that I recognized. Astrid's pain, and how she's always looking back on her life and what it could've been compared to what it is, was something I read over and over and over.
As an adult, when I left NYC for California, it was one of the few books I kept unpacked during our move. Revisiting it I was reminded of the scene where Astrid, starving in the home with the woman who collects foster girls, walks in the rain and finds herself in front of the apartment she shared with Ingrid and the pool is covered in algae. I have literally HAD that dream, where I go back to the house I lived in with my mom and see it as though its been there encased in amber this entire time. Again, I felt seen anew by this novel (imperfect though it's florid prose might be lol) and just sat there still with the open book on my lap. It sounds sad, and maybe it is, but it's also a good feeling. x
This is seriously so beautiful! Thank you for sharing so candidly about your experience. I’m so sorry that you had such similar experiences to these types of books but I’m so glad you were able to connect with them in that way.
What a wonderful read, Hunter. Thank you for sharing all that you do. I feel similar to you when you say that you're less interested in yourself these days... like you, I want to know other people's stories. But there were definitely books that were there for me when I was trying to figure myself out. I think Jhumpa Lahiri is an author I came upon in my youth that did that for me, that helped me understand certain things I couldn't articulate about my childhood. I did find nuggets of myself in books that dealt with some bigger experiences--in fact, I believe it was you that recommended Look How Happy I'm Making You by Polly Rosenwaike, a book I wish I had read before having a kid, just so I might've been better prepared or less shocked, emotionally. Instead I read it a few years after and the recognition ran DEEP. Thank you, Hunter!
I loved reading this! Really moving and a lot I can identify with.
I, too, have felt really seen by WHITE OLEANDER. My mother died when I was 14 and a big part of my mother loss experience has been how my life was one way before her death and after her death it was totally different. Everything from my old life, material and emotional, was gone overnight. I literally never saw it again. WHITE OLEANDER was the first book that articulated that loss on the page in a way that I recognized. Astrid's pain, and how she's always looking back on her life and what it could've been compared to what it is, was something I read over and over and over.
As an adult, when I left NYC for California, it was one of the few books I kept unpacked during our move. Revisiting it I was reminded of the scene where Astrid, starving in the home with the woman who collects foster girls, walks in the rain and finds herself in front of the apartment she shared with Ingrid and the pool is covered in algae. I have literally HAD that dream, where I go back to the house I lived in with my mom and see it as though its been there encased in amber this entire time. Again, I felt seen anew by this novel (imperfect though it's florid prose might be lol) and just sat there still with the open book on my lap. It sounds sad, and maybe it is, but it's also a good feeling. x
This is seriously so beautiful! Thank you for sharing so candidly about your experience. I’m so sorry that you had such similar experiences to these types of books but I’m so glad you were able to connect with them in that way.
What a wonderful read, Hunter. Thank you for sharing all that you do. I feel similar to you when you say that you're less interested in yourself these days... like you, I want to know other people's stories. But there were definitely books that were there for me when I was trying to figure myself out. I think Jhumpa Lahiri is an author I came upon in my youth that did that for me, that helped me understand certain things I couldn't articulate about my childhood. I did find nuggets of myself in books that dealt with some bigger experiences--in fact, I believe it was you that recommended Look How Happy I'm Making You by Polly Rosenwaike, a book I wish I had read before having a kid, just so I might've been better prepared or less shocked, emotionally. Instead I read it a few years after and the recognition ran DEEP. Thank you, Hunter!
This is so wonderful - thank you for sharing!